Plain talk about Abortion: a Personal Story
Posted: Saturday, October 25, 2008
by Teresa Ortiz
Freelance writer/Speaker
Lately there has been no escaping the topic of abortion. We have the pro-choicer, pro-lifer, and enough statistics to make anyone puke.
I am so tired of all the politics--should it be legal--should it be illegal. Does it really matter? Abortion and the attitude toward it are not going to change with the making of law. Since when has law affected real change on the inside? Who in our government speaks of a change of heart? Isn't that where it all starts?
I have remained silent in this arena for many reasons, one being I hate political and statistical debates and frankly, they get on and in my nerves more than anything else does.
Nevertheless, my heart is breaking and I can no longer remain silent. It's not the millions of babies that make me speak out, it's that there has been one. Isn't one enough? If I may be selfish for a moment, isn't mine enough?
I prefer talking about the lighter things in life. When I write or teach, it's generally on the side of humor. Humor is a funny thing--it's not as easily accepted in the Christian world. I'm not sure why. It's like some Christians don't want others to think they are not spiritually profound or well versed in the Bible or something. Heaven forbid we should have a light-hearted story to share the truth of God as He works in everyday life.
I say this because if you have read anything I have written so far, you've noticed that my tone is different. I can be sober-I can cut to the heart of a matter. I suppose this is one of those times.
Therefore, I will take you back in time-join me in the waiting room with seven other teens. You are sitting there in silence, scared out of your mind, feeling all alone. Then you spot a girl from school. You know, the popular one-the model-the cheerleader. You make eye contact from across the room and suddenly you have a friend-a friend who is your enemy at school. Why is this? Because no way is she going back to school on Monday to tell her friends where she spent her Friday night, nor are you.
Sitting in the lounge chair designed for your comfort, the nurse brings you some muscle relaxers. She smiles a warm smile and tells you that everything is going to be okay. You are anxiously awaiting your turn as if you were auditioning for a role in a horror movie, it would seem the case as you get a good look at the face of the girl who exits the room while the nurse calls your name.
Feel the cold bed pressed against your back as you put your feet in the stirrups
Walk with me into the recovery room-listen to the wailing and crying coming from the other girls, listen to your own. Fortunately, you don't have to listen for long because it only takes 15-minutes to recover. Just 15-minutes to forget the sound of the sloshing vacuum. 15-minutes to wipe your eyes, leave the building and start your weekend.
The smiling nurse has no time or need to comfort you with a hug on your way out the door; she is too busy handing out a fresh batch of muscle relaxers-although sweet as she is, she doesn't let you walk out empty-handed. She gives you a brown bag of goodies that will reduce your chances of a return visit.
~~~~~
So how is this for a statistic-how about sharing this story on T.V.? Oh, sure there are organizations out there to help a woman deal with the consequences of her choice to murder her unborn child--what about help to make a better choice to begin with?
Still, this doesn't do anything to solve the problem. We need to get back to the root of the problem and that is Sin. It all boils down to sin. No premarital sex as a teen or adult and we solve a big portion of the problem. The rest of the problem would be solved if men stopped raping and molesting women. Sin, it's all about sin.
At the very least, there should be a law that requires full disclosure of the medical procedure and the developmental stages of an unborn child be made available to the one who is considering ending the life of her child. It still amazes me that my husband was required to have one counseling session and watch a video before the hospital would approve his vasectomy. "Are you sure you want to do this Mr. Ortiz? It is a near impossibility to have the procedure reversed". Wow! I would say it is 100% impossible to have the abortion procedure reversed. In addition, if my son were to get in a car accident, the hospital could not treat him without my consent. Weird how an under aged girl can go through a life-changing medical procedure without her parents knowledge and signature.
Weird.
How would you like to take a second trip to Planned Parenthood with me? The brown bag of goodies didn't do me any good
Repentance, grace, knowledge, love, and education are going to be the end of abortion. A few stories like mine from the candidates might help, but mine will never be told-because I am a nobody, of no influence or money. I am therefore, a statistic.
Obviously this isn't going to happen so what do we do? We stop debating and start praying for change. If you have been moved by my story, share it with someone who has influence. I am convinced if teens and women were told the truth about abortion, the law wouldn't matter, because they would choose something different. Maybe not all, but one- isn't one enough?
For some of you, this wasn't your only trip to Planned Parenthood (Ha! Planned Parenthood-there's a deadly joke for you) If you are looking for help and freedom from guilt or if you just want to read a poem of forgiveness and healing, click here.
© Teresa Ortiz 2008
This Article has been viewed 1,159 times. (Not updated in real-time.)
More commentsTeresa - You are addressing a person - unless you think a computer chip is talking to you right now. Just because I am anonymous does not mean I am less of a person than you are. You have a good point when you say a message cannot be meaningless and judgemental at the same time. I will pick one - judgemental. I have an issue with people who claim to speak for god. People are people. God is god - above it all. The word sin is a religious term. When you use that term you are saying that you speak for god. You cannot speak for god because you are only human - just like the rest of us.I look at life in simple terms, that is why I say murder is murder. I believe you when you say it is very hard for any woman to consider, or have an abortion. Let's face facts here, it is very easy for anyone to understand that giving a baby life is better for the baby than killing it. It takes very little intelligence to understand this. Understanding that abortion is bad for a baby is a very easy thing to do. I repeat, why is that hard?Hi Anon,I am assuming you are the first anon who commented and are not related to anon # 2, or "C" as she stated at the end.I will be writing to her a little later.1) I didn't say that I wasn't addressing people, I said I was not addressing religious people (or just religious people)--which was in response to your first comment.2) We have both established abortion is murder so we are in agreement.3) You have a problem with me calling murder sin. Okay, lets just say that I don't use the word sin. Were does that leave us? What then do you call murder? is it okay to murder? Or is it wrong? The word "wrong" would still be a judgmental statement. So unless you believe that murder is okay and not wrong, then you too are a judgemental person by your own definition. Sin may be a religious term, I won't argue that, but its just a word game. Wrong is wrong, bad choice, whatever you want to call it. And if I might remind you I am the one who had these abortions, I am the one who murdered two of her unborn children. It is not easy to say that. So when I say abortion is sin, I am including myself in that. So, yes I judge my action according to what God says in his word, the bible. (how else to we know murder is murder) And even if I don't call it sin, which I didn't at first, it still left me with guilt, shame, sadness, regret. So what do I do with all of that? Who releaves me of that? Nothing I could do can get rid of it. Not the fake plastered on smile for everyone else to see, because I cannot hide from myself. I don't know of anyone who can. The only thing that released me was to admit to myself what I did, to mourn the loss of those innocent babies and seek God's freedom, forgiveness and peace. This is what this article was about. Not to debate. Did you read my poem, did you read were I offered the answer for healing. I noticed you haven't commented on that one. I would love to know what you think of it and how I might change that if necessary. You can click on the link at the bottom of this article. My heart breaks for those who have experienced what I did and I want to see them restored more than anything else. Don't you? You seem like a compassionate person, so why are you judging me for offering the only hope I know to be real? Instead, how about working with me to offer another source of healing if you don't think that going to God is the answer.I can only assume you have never had an abortion or considered one based on what seems to be your biggest frustration with my story, and I am glad for you.But I am reaching out to those who are hurting. Like anon # 2 who I can relate to in a very intimate way.and I never said you were less of a person. I just wish I could address a name, but then again as it was just pointed out on another article. The name doesn't matter.Anyway, no need to respond unless you can give me a genuine answer to what you believe murder is, and if our conversation can become productive. I am willing to hear another perspective on how to deal with the aftermath of abortion. Let's direct these women to some help. I'll pray and offer God and you can offer your solution. What do you say?Peace
Teresa - I read your entire response to my words. I'll give you my opinion. Remember, it is only my opinion. Yes, you had two abortions, if I remember your words correctly.The past is the past. Forgive yourself. You have the power to do that. The question is, will you? Yes, I am being sincere. You had two abortions, but I did not say I think you should punish yourself forever. I think your life is very much worth living. I also think living in a constant state of self punishment is not the way to live it. You are still here. Make the most of it. Don't ask someone else or something else for peace, just be at peace. In my opinion, you have the power to do that.My issue with the word sin has gotten us into circular, analytical thinking. I don't want to continue with that. I'll simplify. I didn't say god wants you to do this or that. I did not say doing this or that is a sin. I did not invoke god, because I cannot speak for god. I can only give you my opinion. In my opinion, you have the power to forgive yourself. I recommend you do just that.Hi Anon # 1,Well, you didn't answer my question as to whether or not you thought murder was wrong, but that's okay. I'll drop it.I do appreciate your more productive offers to the solution.I no longer carry the guilt. I do live my life to the fullest because of God's grace.For me, forgiving myself doesn't work. But it might for others for thanks for sharing those words of encouragement.I firmly believe in Jesus Christ and His work on the cross. It is where I found true and lasting peace and joy. So for me, I rely on God for everything, that is not to say that I do not use the brain he gave me or that I am a puppet on a string, it just means I live my life to please him and in return I have a full and abundant life that brings me great laughter and joy no matter what my circumstances.I appreciate that your way works for you. And thanks for helping to turn this into a respectful conversation where two different perspectives can be offered.Peace.
Hi Again - Two points I forgot to make. Thanks for reminding me. In my opinion, murder is murder. That does not mean you have to punish yourself. I also believe in god. That does not mean I have the ability or right to speak for that power. Believing in and speaking for are two different things.That's all for me - Best RegardsHi again. Of course murder is murder, but do you think its wroing? That was the question. Anyway, thanks for sharing. I don't speak for God either, I only repeat what he has already said in his word to us.All the best to you. It has been great speaking with you, whoever you are :-)
Yes, murder is wrong. If you think you know what god "said", from the bible perhaps(?), then you do speak for him/her/it - even though you claim not to.I appreciate your kind words.What I meant was I don't speak anything he hasn't already spoken. Like make something up.The source is the Bible. So when I live by and repeat what the Bible says, then yes in this respect I speak for him. Sorry I didn't make that clear.Actually, He calls all those who follow Him to be his hands, feet, and lips. Jesus told us this in the Bible.Thank you for your kind words as well.
Hi Teresa - I know exactly what you meant. I don't know how deep you want to go with this, but I will take it a little further to see if you are interested in talking about it. If not, that is ok with me.I find that "religious" people tend to be interested in explaining their point of view to others, and those others are supposed to believe things exactly as explained to them. I like to think about things and make sense out of them.How do you know the bible is really god talking? After all, it is just a book that was written on a printer. Your pastor/priest/neighbor told you? Who told him? I'm sure you can see where I am going with this. How do you know? Yes, I am asking you to go beyond repeating what you have been told. I am asking you to think.Is this a challenge :-)I will go as far as you would like to go with this if is for the purpose of learning and understanding. I agree with your assement of some religious people.I will be happy to explain why I believe what I believe if you agree to a few things.1. Don't assume I only repeat what my pastor tells me.2. Don't assume I don't think for myself.3. Don't assume I don't like to think about things and make sense of them before I take them in.4. Don't assume I am a religious person(There is a difference between a religious person and a person who has a relationship with God.)You have made a judgement about me without knowing me. I figure you are someone who doesn't know me, or you would not have made the above assumptions. You would know that I am a hard-headed strong willed woman who doesn't give in to everything that comes my way. Can you agree to this? And do you have true motives of understanding?I make no assumptions of you, so I am asking from a sincere heart.There is many external and internal reasons why I believe the Bible to be the word of God.If you are interested let me know, if so, I will write an article entitled, How can we trust the Bible. You just have to give me a few days. I will start working on it as soon as I hear from you. Its too much to go into here, and I don't want to stray to far from the point of this article.Who knows, maybe at some point you will even share your identity. :-)Teresa
Teresa - You make a lot of assumptions about me - especially about your apparant belief that I am making a lot assumptions about you. Your assumptions about me is what that 4 point list is all about. You can put your boxing gloves down. I have no boxing gloves to use anyway.You eagerly shared some of your beliefs with me, without prompting/request from me. The purpose of my follow up questions is to dig into your thinking/ideas (the ones you dropped in my lap during the last topic) to see how deep it goes. To me, that is reasonable. I will agree to be honest and sincere with you, and stay with the discussion without revealing personal details about myself. I recommend you do the same. That is all. Any agreement that is more complex than that will limit the conversation we can have. I am not interested in that. If you think I asked you those questions to argue or be unpleasant, then I recommend you decline any further discussion with me. I am not interested in having a conversation with your boxing gloves.I will be happy to wait until you post your next article, and respond to continue the discussion. If you don't want me to, let me know and I will go away.Hi I am sorry that I misunderstood what you said when you said you are asking me to go beyond what I have been told and when you said you are asking me to think. To me that sounded like you were assuming that is what I do. I don't not mean to make it sound defensive and I do not have any boxing gloves on. I don't own any. That is not my style.I write and share information based on what I have learned and experienced and I welcome good-healthy conversations if what I write leads to that. But I do not force my belief or opinion on anyone.I would not ask you to reveal anything personal about yourself just to have a conversation on the Bible, its not necessary or constructive.Again I apologize for misunderstanding your point. I will be happy to continue-no gloves, only handshakes.
your writing ALWAYS reminds us the power of God, the mercy and grace in fills us with and the love by which he guides us. Thank you, Teresa.Hi Walter, thanks for the kinds words of encouragement. I am humbled. Lord bless you!!
Thanks for a well written article! It's always good to have informed positions to read. I encourage others to read this twice!Hi Victor, I appreciate the kind words. I will be reading your articles soon :-)
I think that every teenager should have to go waaay beyond what the health classes teach. teen's dont think anything of it. They jsut dont know or understand what they are doing. Its not just limited to teenagers, but i think if they learned early on it would help a lot, people are getting abortions like it is a form of birth control. and it's not ok, it is murder. i dont think ppl understand the consequences of what they do until it is too late. it makes me so mad.. i wish people understood life.. and how it works, and that that baby is alive, and has a future ahead of them.Hi Jess,Thank you for your input. You are so right. This is exactly why I shared my story. I hope people, men and women, boys and girls read. And given any opportunity I would share with a group of teens a more detailed and personal account of the affects of abortion. There are many woman like me, and still to many ashamed to come forward and voice this devastating truth. Again, thanks for reading and commenting on several articles. As you can see, life can take many turns. Blessings to you! Teresa
Oh, Teresa ~ my heart! So well written and so heart wrenching. The poem, it is dynamite too....thank you for bare-ing, care-ing and share-ing....MarijoIt's worth it if it helps just one person. Thanks for reading. BLessings to you! Teresa
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